5 Real Talk Tips - Divorce Hacks Your Lawyer Might Skip

I’m a family lawyer who’s seen it all when it comes to separation and divorce. I’ve noticed there are a few things about divorce that don’t always get talked about. Knowing these insider tips can save you a lot of hassle, heartbreak (and cash) down the road.

1. DIY Divorce? Totally Doable. – Lawyers love to talk about the dangers of going it alone, but if your breakup is pretty straightforward (think: not a lot of assets, you both agree on the basics), you might not need us. There’s a ton of resources out there to help you handle things on your own. Just know it’s not for everyone, especially if things are messy or complicated.

2. Family Law Isn’t Rocket Science – Coming from a lawyer, this might sound weird, but the basics of family law are pretty simple. It’s all about splitting things up fairly, figuring out what’s best for the kids, and helping everyone move on. The hard part is usually the emotions and unique situations, not the law itself.

3. Mediation: The Chill Divorce Path – Traditional divorce can be a long, expensive headache. Mediation is like the cool, laid-back cousin that can save you time and money. You work with a neutral person to sort things out without going to war in court. Lawyers might not push this since it means fewer billable hours, but it’s a great option for a lot of people.

4. Haggle Those Legal Fees – Believe it or not, legal fees aren’t set in stone. There’s wiggle room, whether it’s the billing method (hourly vs. flat rate) or what’s included. Talk money upfront and don’t be shy about negotiating to make sure you can afford the help you need. Lawyers are not allowed to charge you for these questions!

5. Pick your battles– In the heat of divorce, it’s easy to get caught up in the nitty gritty of the now and forget about the future. Lawyers might not remind you to think ahead and pick your battles, especially with money. Future you will thank you for considering the long game and having allowed yourself to move on.

So there you have it. Dive into your divorce with these truths in your back pocket, and you’ll be in a much better spot. Remember, lawyers are key in navigating these waters, but being informed and understanding the process yourself is priceless.